Foreclosure deadline
I feel like everything I've done up to this point, everything I've endured and everything I've gone without, has been for the greater good. I didn't want to tarnish the memory of my in-laws and their surviving family. Who needs that news spread all across social media?! I didn't want to have to answer any prying questions, let alone accept my part in the failed marriage and the resulting catastrophe.
But, mostly, I hate confrontation. I've let things slide. I have valid excuses too, of course, like how I'm so busy working all the time and I can't afford a lawyer, etc., but mostly they're just excuses.
And I'm about to suffer financially for it.
When I left the house, I left all the financial responsibility in the hands of my not-quite ex. He had been paying the mortgage already, so I left it for him to continue paying. I saw a lawyer who would not take me on because she knew it would bankrupt me and I left it be. I used the excuse of his erratic behaviour and crazy nights and potential psychotic episodes to just live quietly with my boys.
When he started moving people in, the bike thieves, the hookers, and other squatters, I used that excuse to not deal with it. The situation was even crazier at that point and I didn't want to expose any of my friends to a potentially dangerous situation just so he could be served some papers.
Then life got busier. My mother-in-law passed away. My father-in-law passed away. I had found a new romantic partner and was trying to get my life back under control. I had switched companies at work. I was working more to earn more and get off income assistance so I could be financially independent.
And then I found out he was skipping mortgage payments. The mortgage that was still half under my name.
When I first moved out, I had spoken to an advisor at the bank and the only way to get my name off the mortgage is to obtain a signed separation agreement. You know, the papers that I had been putting off obtaining because he was an unstable drug addict and I couldn't afford a lawyer?
I received a letter in the mail from the bank today. The house is now 10 days from being sent to the lawyers who will start the ball rolling for foreclosure. Which will absolutely kill my credit because I didn't have the courage to get this sorted months ago.
I feel helpless. I didn't ask for this. All I wanted was to move on and I feel like he's still controlling the situation and I'm going to be screwed because he's spiteful.
I feel like I'll never truly escape him.
But, mostly, I hate confrontation. I've let things slide. I have valid excuses too, of course, like how I'm so busy working all the time and I can't afford a lawyer, etc., but mostly they're just excuses.
And I'm about to suffer financially for it.
When I left the house, I left all the financial responsibility in the hands of my not-quite ex. He had been paying the mortgage already, so I left it for him to continue paying. I saw a lawyer who would not take me on because she knew it would bankrupt me and I left it be. I used the excuse of his erratic behaviour and crazy nights and potential psychotic episodes to just live quietly with my boys.
When he started moving people in, the bike thieves, the hookers, and other squatters, I used that excuse to not deal with it. The situation was even crazier at that point and I didn't want to expose any of my friends to a potentially dangerous situation just so he could be served some papers.
Then life got busier. My mother-in-law passed away. My father-in-law passed away. I had found a new romantic partner and was trying to get my life back under control. I had switched companies at work. I was working more to earn more and get off income assistance so I could be financially independent.
And then I found out he was skipping mortgage payments. The mortgage that was still half under my name.
When I first moved out, I had spoken to an advisor at the bank and the only way to get my name off the mortgage is to obtain a signed separation agreement. You know, the papers that I had been putting off obtaining because he was an unstable drug addict and I couldn't afford a lawyer?
I received a letter in the mail from the bank today. The house is now 10 days from being sent to the lawyers who will start the ball rolling for foreclosure. Which will absolutely kill my credit because I didn't have the courage to get this sorted months ago.
I feel helpless. I didn't ask for this. All I wanted was to move on and I feel like he's still controlling the situation and I'm going to be screwed because he's spiteful.
I feel like I'll never truly escape him.
Comments
Post a Comment